To his wife: His overdraft at the bank. Maybe she can explain it.
To his son: Equity on his car. Now he will have to go to work to meet the payments.
To his banker: His soul. The banker has the mortgage on it anyway.
To his neighbor: His clown suit. The neighbor will need it if he continues to farm as he has in the past.
To the farm credit corporation: His unpaid bills. They took some real chances on him. He wants to do something for them.
To the junk man: All his machinery. The junk man had his eyes on it for years.
To his undertaker: A special request. He wants six implement dealers and six fertilizer dealers for pallbearers. They are used to carrying him.
To the weatherman: Rain, hail and snow for the funeral please. No sense in having good weather now.
To the grave digger: Don’t bother. The hole he’s in now should be big enough.
To the monument maker: Set up a jig for the epitaph. “Here lies a farmer who has now properly assumed all of his obligations.”